fairly possible reality

I am VERY tired. 6 1/2 hours of play practice can do that to a person. Whew! when this week is over, there will be relief all around. I wish I could just skip over tha awkward heartbreaking horrid teenage years and wake up with my bachelor's degree and a fiancee. School is SO pointless sometimes. Of course, maybe going to an all-girls school could help with another problem... guys. WHY do we need them?!?! I mean, granted, a couple of them are pretty cool. but the vast majority of guys are SO impossible to understand, get along with, and hang out with. I know for sure that I will NEVER really unserstand them. I am SO sick of trying to find some guy willing enough to be mine, so why do I still pursue it? I know I'm too young to get married, and I don't really want to, but "unfortunately" God put a hopelessly romantic heart in me, and right now the thing I want most is just for some guy to really LIKE me, value me and want me for his. I know this is selfish and somewhat shallow. so WHY do I feel like this? I wish I could be tough, and be able to withstand silly criticisms thrown at me. But sometimes, I can't. I wish I didnt cry when a crush turns out to like another girl, one prettier and thinner and sweeter than me. But I do. this time of growing up is too hard for me, without God. So God, where are you? do you hear my prayers? Do you REALLY want to give me what I need and want? please come save me from my despondency.